pre-miracle post

I haven’t blogged in a while.  For a variety of different reasons.  

1. Everything I think of to say is depressing
2. I am struggling with not being depressed
3. I feel like we don’t have any events to share
4. I don’t have any pictures
5. I have been working and have too much time on my hands

So now I have decided that it’s time to “just do it”.  If other people read my blog, that’s awesome, if not, well that’s ok too.  Someday I hope I look back on this post and am amazed at how far God has brought us and I will be able to see the miracles and answers to pray and use this blog as a gauge for how AMAZING God truly is.

Life is erratic to say the least for us right now.  I quit my job at the doctor’s office and while I am a happier person in general, it does not fix everything.

Chelsey found out she is having a boy and decided to keep the baby and raise him herself, and never wants to hear from us again. (This came to me from a friend that also knows Chelsey)

Chad was hired on full time at UPRAD!  This is an answer to prayer, we will have health insurance, although the pay is ridiculously low.  

I have been picking up shifts at UPRAD on the ambulance, as well to help bring in some money.  It’s easy work, mostly because I have done it for so long and because we haven’t really run any calls!  I will continue to pick up shifts to help supplement our income.

I am jumping through the hoops of going back to school.  I have (from the best of my calculations -- without an advisors help...yet) about 1 year to finish my degree in elementary education through Regis.  I have everything done that I can do and am just waiting on the final transcripts to come through.  I would like to start classes Jan 10, but it is completely dependent on financial aid.  

Our lease will be up in May, we are looking to reduce our expenses, so hoping to find a house with a much smaller payment.  We are hoping to buy a home and be settled for a while!  Chad’s parents are willing to help us get into a home, so that is a huge help.

Due to our financial “crisis” we have had to put adopting on hold.  This is for an unknown period of time.  My very wise husband (the realist side of this relationship) pointed out that it is very difficult to add additional expenses to an already stretched budget.  So, my hope is in the future we will get to revisit this, and if not, well God has a plan for that as well.  He is and will continue to be the balm for my hurting heart and soul.

It is an emotional, roller coaster of a ride.  Financially, we went from wonderful, amazing amount of income, to peanuts.  Emotionally, I am still a roller coaster.  I have good days, bad days and some days with both wrapped up into one.  I have struggled through jobs and now am in a different situation than I could have ever imagined myself being in.

I am completely and totally reliant upon Christ to rescue me, pick me up and carry me through this stage of life.  

I am ready to see the view from the top of this mountain.  We have had a turbulent two years and I holding on to the promise that God will not give us more than we can handle and he will provide a way of escape! 

I am at the end of me and beyond all self-sufficiency that i can muster.

I am completely and utterly reliant on the saving grace and power of my Savior and the Lord of my life, the King and Prince of Peace.

Thank you for your prayers!